Author: yourautisticlife

  • A Senseless Breakup As a Zen Koan

    A Senseless Breakup As a Zen Koan

    She put me in an impossible situation, and gave me the gift of a koan. I’m still reeling from the worst breakup of my life. Well, the worst breakup so far. There’s no telling if something even worse will come some day. It’s been almost two years, but last night a song came up and…

  • Gift Giving: A Minefield

    Gift Giving: A Minefield

    I’m both a bad giver and a bad receiver of gifts, according to society, at any rate. Gift giving is a minefield for most autistic folks. It definitely is one for me. Since Valentine’s Day is upon us, here’s a reflection on why most options are terrible. In no specific order, A great part of…

  • Neuroqueer Meeting: 2025/02/23

    Here is the page that explains what this is all about. Leave a comment here if you plan to come. We need a headcount as accurate as possible. Delete your comment if you cannot come. Thank you.

  • Is Meditation More Pleasurable Than Sex?

    Is Meditation More Pleasurable Than Sex?

    What being neurodivergent and queer has taught me about this question. There is frank talk about sex in what follows here, including masochism. In my view, it is light talk, but reader beware. From time to time I see claims that meditation is indeed more pleasurable than sex. Wow! Let’s reach for the meditation cushion…

  • Getting Rid of Old Shit

    Getting Rid of Old Shit

    I’m lightening the load. Don’t think for one second that getting rid of old shit is easy for me. I do find all kinds of reasons to keep stuff around, but life events sometimes insist on your making the decision to get rid of shit. My divorce was such an event. I had to part…

  • On Zen Practice

    On Zen Practice

    The revolutionary art of unlearning. I don’t think that what follows is especially original. It was probably communicated to me at the beginning of my practice, but I was too bewildered and stupid to understand it. It is only now, after years of practice, that I finally understand what was communicated. When I talk about…

  • Why Are Autistic Folks Generally Tolerant?

    Why Are Autistic Folks Generally Tolerant?

    I do have a simple theory. My theory is that it is because we don’t generally believe in arbitrary social conventions. Those very same conventions usually do not serve us, autistic folks, well. Once the social conventions that oppress us daily are seen as arbitrary, it does not take much to realize that most other…

  • UnitedHealth’s Stupidity Is Suffocating

    UnitedHealth’s Stupidity Is Suffocating

    What kind of idiots run this company?????????? UnitedHealth was hit in a data breach. They did exactly what you should not do. For fuck’s sake! You do not need to be a genius to fucking know what I’m going to fucking tell you here. If you guessed that I am mad, well, bingo! You win…

  • GGG: Giving and Game, yes, but Good???

    GGG: Giving and Game, yes, but Good???

    How can anyone label themselves good in the abstract? Photo by Michael Prewett on Unsplash I have a problem with the label GGG that I see so often in dating profiles on the dating apps. This label means Good, Giving, and Game. It was coined by sex columnist Dan Savage. I get that diligent people…

  • Clipped Wings

    Clipped Wings

    An ex-partner of mine asked me to fly with clipped wings. I declined the offer. Photo by Raindrops Photography on Unsplash I’m tired. I’m tired of encountering people who don’t know what they want, and who don’t know what polyamory is or have a contorted opinion of what it is. I’m damn tired. You need…